What is Going on?

I cant blame myself for being like this. I'm freaking terribly upset with it. Had i made the right choice to study the course I am currently studying? Had i really committed to this course? Can i really succeed in future? Will I be able to pass the exams with flying colours? Is that my interest? Am i that stupid?

The questions above had popped up in my mind for the past few hours. I was thinking all the way whether i had made the right choice to study my used-to-be favourite course. None of my souls could exactly give me the real answers. Maybe i can't really find the real answers i want. This is because the answers i might get are the answers that I am not willing to hear and know after all.

As i know, my course is getting tougher right now. No one could really understand my difficulties in these problems. I am trying very hard and put a lot of effort to it. But it seems it doesnt work for me after all. Even my seniors said my subjects for this semester are very tough. After going through lectures and tutorials, now i know how tough are they. :( And thanks a lot to the UTAR management for making such BIG changes. THANKIU SO MUCH!!!

Let me tell you guys what am I studying for this current semester. First and foremost, my 'favourite' subject - Mathematics for Engineering. I used to like maths. But due to certain incidents happened to me, i started to hate it. But right now, i'm putting a lot of effort to it. WIsh me luck k? :) Secondly is Chemical Engineering Thermodynamics. Again i would say it is my favourite subject. I love this subject a lot seriously. NO LIES k? I'm telling the truth! But it was my favourite subject when i was in Form Six. Haha. Now i just started to love it partly because i love the lecturer. LOL. Just joking. :P Actually this is because i started to know how interesting the subject is. Thirdly, it is Fluid Mechanics. It is all about fluids. Quite interesting though. =) Next subject is Dynamics! I dislike the lecturer a lot. Zzzzz. And it is a tough subject i would say. Haih. Up next is Introduction to Chemical Engineering. Almost the same as Chemical Engineering Thermodynamics. Finally, the sixth subject is Heat and Mass Transfer. =.="

Mostly all the subjects i had mentioned above are reading subjects. *faint* Six subjects you know??????!!!!!!! *cry* Crazy UTAR management! isk isk. I just hate it. haih. I wished to start all over again. REALLY!!!! I really hope some miracles will happen in my life. *pray hard* hmm.

*currently listening to Lee Hom's new songs with nice weather perhaps*
*searching for informations regarding my assignments* *cry*